Sales Pitch

When John died, representatives of Heaven and Hell showed up.

“Come with me, and live in eternal bliss, love and happiness,” said the angel.

“Sounds boring, don’t it?” said the little devil.  “Come with me, it’ll be fun!”

“Your pants are on fire,” said John.

“Occupational Hazard,” said the devil.

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Guardian Angel

A faraway future:

POOF!

“Hi!”

“Who are you?”

“I’m your guardian angel.”

“Boy are you wasting your time, then.”

“Why?  You think you don’t deserve me?”

“No.”

“You already have a guardian angel?”

“Nope.”

“You don’t believe in angels?”

“Nah.”

“Then what?”

“I’m an angel too.  The humans are gone.”

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