Online Dating at its Finest

For the past month, none of the girls on this online dating site had replied.

He was depressed, now.  All alone in this basement he hadn’t left for weeks, he lived on a diet of Cheetos and Pepsi.

A freak virus had wiped out humanity, but he still didn’t know.

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The Telegram

FROM: THE WRITER

TO: PRESIDENT ABRAHAM LINCOLN

FORD’S THEATRE

APRIL 14TH 1865

THIS MESSAGE WAS SENT FROM 200 YEARS IN THE FUTURE STOP

THE PEOPLE OF EARTH WISH TO THANK YOU FOR YOUR INCOMPARABLE SERVICE TO HUMANITY STOP

ALSO WHEN YOU HEAR THE LINE: “YOU SOCK-DOLOGIZING OLD MAN-TRAP” REMEMBER TO DUCK STOP

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